Wednesday, November 11, 2009

James Cameron is sending the U.S. military on a very questionable mission

Has anyone seen the preview for this new movie Avatar? I am so confused! First of all, how can you spend $300 million on a movie and use Papyrus as the official font for all your titles, logos and marketing materials? Papyrus comes free with Microsoft Word, and it's the font that everyone uses when they think they're choosing something that looks cool, when in fact they're doing the complete opposite (see the wedding invitations your sister designed for you). In the off chance you're not sure what Papyrus looks like, here's a sampling:

Here's the same font, Papyrus, used in the logo for James Cameron's Avatar:

...and again in the teaser:

What in the name of Pandora is going on here? Can James Cameron not afford to buy the font of his choosing? Why go with the freebie? I know we're in a recession, but there are other ways he could have cut corners in this film without sacrificing the dignity of the designers.

Which leads us to the actual movie. Here's the trailer for Avatar:

Jigga waaaaa? Why is James Cameron sending the U.S. military on some wild crusade to kill off a bunch of innocent fairies and pixies? We're already fighting two wars. We don't need to take on another. Imagine the billions of dollars it will take just to get our troops out to their planet. Apparently they have some amazing natural resource out there. But we haven't even fully committed to our own renewable resources yet. I'm talking about the wind, the water, and the sun, my god the almighty sun. I thought we were trying to reduce our dependency on foreign oil. It doesn't get much more foreign than this Pandora planet.

I don't know what else to say. I'm exhausted. Maybe James Cameron will explain himself in the feature-length film, but I have serious doubts that this war is gonna turn out well for anybody involved.

Monday, November 2, 2009

Cheeze N Cracker Crisp - The cereal made with real Wisconsin cheese!

Editor's note: This is the second installment in a 12-part series on sandwich cookies and other assorted sandwich-like snack items.

Remember Cookie Crisp? How 'bout Oreo O's? These were cereals founded on the seemingly delicious premise of cookies floating in milk. Yes, it sounds like a good idea, but I was never all that into it. Probably because I don't have much of a sweet tooth. I'm the type of person who would rather have my birthday candles stuck in meatloaf than sheet cake. I guess you could say I pitch my tent in the savory camp.

So when the time came for me to create my own cereal for home consumption, I thought long and hard about what's missing in the modern cereal aisle. Believe you me, there are a lot of cereals out there. Which makes it all the more remarkable that no one else beat me to this idea. Are you ready? No? How 'bout now? OK, here it is... Cheeze N Cracker Crisp, yes, made with real Wisconsin cheese.

350% calcium daily value per serving.

You know that feeling after you eat some cheese and crackers and all you want is a tall glass of milk to wash it down? It's like you can't have one without the other. And that's what makes Cheeze N Cracker Crisp so perfect. It's what you've always wanted in a cereal. You just didn't know it until now.